In Support of a UN Commission on Proportionality
January 9th, 2009Israel’s recent unfair attack on Gaza highlights the need not only of greater proportionality in military responses but also the need for the world community to enforce such measures. Just as we restrict individuals from acting in their own self-interests, we must likewise restrict individual nations, especially when their interests are petty, such as self-survival.
The disproportionality of Israel’s response to Hamas has shocked the world; at least the advanced parts of the world where morality remains forever relative. So, Hamas has fired a few thousand missiles at it, destroying property and killing people. Is this any reason to get upset? Why not compromise and meet them halfway — that is, give them half of Israel? Surely that would satiate them; at least, for a little while.
But if Israel must respond, they should at least have the decency to respond exactly in kind. No more, but hopefully less.
For the betterment of war, it should be conducted rationally and humanely, regardless of its irrational causes or its potentially beneficial aims. It should be conducted as if playing a game of chess or Battleship — with rules, such as “everyone gets a turn.”
And if Israel and other belligerents won’t follow the rules, the rules must be enforced upon them. They must be enforced by the grand world-government-in-waiting, the United Nations, which should forthwith establish the Commission on Proportionality.
This commission — hopefully chaired by that distinguished proponent of proportionality, Zbigniew Brzezinski, who has long understood that the way to confront evil is to placate it into submission — will regulate all conflicts with full legal authority. When a nation or an unrecognized foreign entity attacks another, the commission solely will determine the appropriate response, to which both parties must abide.
So, if Georgia lobs a missile into an Abkhazian school and kills a dozen children, the comission will allow Russia to bomb a Georgian school and kill exactly a dozen of their enemy’s children. And if the Russian bomb inflicts less or more casualties, the numbers will be reconciled by UN forces, which will be sent in to adjust the numbers manually.
Likewise, if the Hutu goes on a rampage and rapes a hundred Tutsi, the commission will make certain that the Hutu provide a hundred of their women for the appropriate proportional response.
Finally, if Iran detonates a single nuclear bomb in Tel Aviv, the commission will let Isreal drop one — and only one — nuclear bomb on Tehran. That is, if it still exists. And if it doesn’t, well, then Sarah Silverman can organize the Great Schlep Part Two, where she and other famous Jews can carry the charred remains of their people back to America, where they will be properly feted for acting proportionally.
Of course, enforcing proportionality won’t likely decrease the amount of conflicts or their deadliness. In fact, it may even increase both, as the ability to deter future acts will surely decrease. But this doesn’t matter. Only fairness does.
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© Copyright 2009 by Colin Cohen. All Rights Reserved.
