Harvesting Fetuses
March 16th, 2009President Obama’s reversal of the federal ban against government handouts for embryonic stem cell research is a testament to what we can do when we place science above all else, including results. But if we could take this type of research just one logical step further, there’s no telling what miracles we could create and what federal money we could spend.
While embryonic stem cell therapies theoretically may hold great potential for the creation of an assortment of regenerative treatments — due to an assortment of potentially unsolvable problems — such treatments have never been realized, in spite of exhaustive amounts of research and funding.
But failure should never stop progress. It should, in fact, spur it further. So, why not allow these scientists — free from all moral and financial restraints — to experiment on a far more advanced form of quasi-humanity? Why not allow them to experiment on fetuses?
All we need do is freeze the fetuses once they’re unceremoniously scooped out of the womb, and store them — much the way we do now with embryos. As there are more than 1.3 million of these “things” produced every year, there likely will never be a shortage of supply. But if there is, we could just import some of the 40 million others that are created from around the world.
As we’ve already determined that fetuses are worthless and unhuman, and hence may be terminated with extreme prejudice at any time, and without due process, we should have no problem allowing scientists to use these carcasses as playgrounds for all sorts of happy research.
Just imagine what advances might be possible if scientists could infect these bodies with the full array of hideous diseases and experiment with cures directly upon them, just like the Nazis did. Perhaps there will be none. But why not try? It’s not like we have anything better to do with our time and money.
And this is only the beginning. As a by-product, we could also use many of the fetal organs as spare parts for those in need — something that has already been proposed by Oxford professor Richard Gardner. Even better, we could finally do away with that cruel and inhuman practice of using animals to test consumer products, by using fetuses instead.
There is only one small problem with all this. Private institutions and corporations will likely demur from funding or even participating in such practices, backwardly thinking it morbid or macabre, just because it violates a few minor precepts of morality.
This is where the federal government comes in, as it clearly has no moral qualms whatsoever, and has shown that it doesn’t care if an investment can actually deliver a return, financial or otherwise. It can fund the entire process, from vacuum to vivisection. And if anyone complains, we’ll simply trot out some sick celebrities and call these bitter misanthropes bad names.
The harvest is upon us, people. It’s time we finally reap what we’ve sown.
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© Copyright 2009 by Colin Cohen. All Rights Reserved.
